Claudia Aisani

Biden’s Secret Weapon: A Time Machine to Remind Voters of the Previous Administration

WASHINGTON — In a bold move to address what White House officials are calling "selective electoral amnesia," President Biden unveiled his administration's latest campaign strategy Wednesday: a time machine designed to transport voters back to "those four years we all try to forget." The device,...

Inflation So High, People Are Trading Money for Candy Bars at the Gas Station

In a shocking turn of events that economists, cashiers, and candy lovers all saw coming, America’s spiraling inflation has driven citizens to a new currency: candy bars. Yes, in a time when the U.S. dollar is practically indistinguishable from Monopoly money, a small but...
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Major City’s Housing Crisis Mysteriously Solved While Politicians Debate Who Should Take Credit

WASHINGTON, DC — In an unprecedented turn of events, the metropolitan area's decade-long housing...

Overworked AI Actor Files Complaint with Virtual Labor Board, Cites ‘Digital Exploitation’

LOS ANGELES—In what's being hailed as a landmark case for artificial performer rights, CGI...
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White House Confirms: No More ‘Helicopter Parents’ Interfering in Dance Routines

WASHINGTON — In what's being hailed as a landmark victory for America's youth, the...

Economy in Shambles: Countries Now Trading in Memes and TikTok Likes

BRUSSELS, BELGIUM - In a move that economists are calling "the most creative economic...

Tsarukyan’s Back? More Like Tsarukyan’s Back OUT!

In a stunning display of athletic commitment that would make a porcelain doll wince,...

Saif Ali Khan Admits His Beard Has Final Say in All Movie Roles

MUMBAI — In a groundbreaking press conference that sent shockwaves through Bollywood, veteran actor...