In a monumental revelation, The American Research Group has just divulged that one sure fire way to get rid of irritating hiccups is to engage in oral sex.
The 11-month study concluded that heightened levels of estrogen and testosterone release tiny amounts of biorhythmic enzymes that when combined with saliva will rid bothersome hiccups within 12 to 15 seconds.
The ARG conducted tests in 47 of the 50 states. The three states that did not participate were Iowa (of course), Kansas (of course), and New Hampshire (which is surprising).
The research, sponsored by the Michael Douglas Foundation, will be published in The Federal Federation of Fellatio’s Oralistic Journal.
