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Steve Bannon Advocates for Trump’s Third Term
WASHINGTON— In a move that has both constitutional scholars and reality itself shaking their...
US
JD Vance Becomes First Millennial VP; White House Staff Braces for Mandatory Avocado Toast Mondays
WASHINGTON, D.C. – History was made today as JD Vance was sworn in as...
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Trump Names Mar-a-Lago Chef as Secretary of State: ‘His Lasagna Has More Layers Than NATO
PALM BEACH, FL — In an unprecedented diplomatic shakeup, Mar-a-Lago's head chef Mario Bianchi...
US
Trump Hires Broadway Choreographer to Make Cabinet Members’ Entrance ‘More Dramatic Than Hamilton
WASHINGTON — In a bold move to ensure his potential return to the presidency...
Politics News
Third-Party Candidate Announces Platform: ‘I Promise Not to Run for President Again
MANCHESTER, NH — In an unprecedented campaign announcement that has sent shockwaves through the...
Politics News
Congress Passes Bill to Replace Electoral College with TikTok Dance-Off
WASHINGTON — In a groundbreaking move to modernize America's democratic process, Congress passed legislation...
Politics News
Presidential Candidate Confirms: ‘I Will Definitely Be Fiscally Responsible With Your Hopes and Dreams
MANCHESTER, NH — Standing at a podium constructed entirely from recycled campaign promises, presidential...
Politics News
Debate Stage Collapses Under Weight of Attack Ads
(WASHINGTON D.C.) - In a development that surprised absolutely no one familiar with the...
Politics News
Biden’s New Plan: A Nap and a Snack, and Maybe a Nap Later
WASHINGTON — In a groundbreaking announcement that's being hailed as "the most comfortable policy...
Politics News
Biden’s Secret Weapon: A Time Machine to Remind Voters of the Previous Administration
WASHINGTON — In a bold move to address what White House officials are calling...
Politics News
Trump Announces New Reality Show: ‘The Apprentice: The Return of the Tangerine Tyrant
IN A TOTALLY REAL DEAL, TRUMP ANNOUNCES NEW REALITY SHOW FROM PRISON: 'THE APPRENTICE:...
US
GOP Proposes New Amendment: Any News That Makes Republicans Uncomfortable is Fake
WASHINGTON — In a groundbreaking move to streamline the fact-checking process, Republican lawmakers introduced...
Politics News
Political Ads Announce Candidate is ‘For the People,’ but Not ‘The People’ in Their District
LOCAL CANDIDATE PROUDLY 'FOR THE PEOPLE,' JUST NOT THESE SPECIFIC PEOPLE HERE SPRINGFIELD, IL —...
Politics News
Love Trumps All: The Secret Affair Between Kamala and Donald They Don’t Want You to Know
BREAKING: Love Trumps All - Secret Romance Between Political Titans Rocks Nation WASHINGTON — In...
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Entertainment
Apple Releases Severance: Workplace Edition, Removes All Fun
CUPERTINO, CA — In a bold move to strengthen corporate compliance and keep workplace...
Politics News
Steve Bannon Advocates for Trump’s Third Term
WASHINGTON— In a move that has both constitutional scholars and reality itself shaking their...
Politics News
Kash Patel Unveils ‘Top Secret’ Documents? Wikipedia what?
WASHINGTON, D.C. – In a shocking exposé that has left the intelligence community somewhere...
Tech
What did European ancestors look like?
Bonkers scientists have unearthed evidence of what the human landscape looked like 10,000 years...