Politics
US
Congress Passes Bill to Make ‘Please’ Optional in Polite Society
In a groundbreaking legislative move that has left etiquette experts baffled and social media...
US
White House Unveils Groundbreaking “Inflation Reduction Trampoline”: Bounce Your Way to Lower Prices!
In a move that economists are calling "unprecedented" and "possibly the result of a...
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Politics News
Congress Passes Bill to Replace Electoral College with TikTok Dance-Off
WASHINGTON — In a groundbreaking move to modernize America's democratic process, Congress passed legislation...
World news
In Major Breakthrough, Scientists Confirm Diplomatic Relations Are Now Just Obsolete Technology
GENEVA, SWITZERLAND - In a development as shocking as a participation trophy at the...
US
Breaking: Senators Seen Reading Legislation They Just Passed, Gasps Ensue
WASHINGTON D.C. - In a scene reminiscent of the lost city of Atlantis being...
US
Debate Over Healthcare Reform Derailed by Heated Disagreement on What Healthcare’ Means
WASHINGTON D.C. – In a display of peak American dysfunction, the much-anticipated healthcare reform...
World news
Nation Relieved To Discover ‘Interim Government’ Isn’t Actually Permanent This Time
In a rare show of cautious optimism, citizens nationwide are reportedly relieved that the...
US
U.S. Government Announces Plan to Solve All Problems by Just Renaming Them
WASHINGTON D.C. – In a move that would make Marie Kondo blush, the U.S....
Politics News
Majority of Voters Say They Want Change, Will Definitely Re-elect Same People in November
WASHINGTON — In a stunning display of cognitive dissonance that has political analysts scratching...
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Supreme Court to Rule on Whether Supreme Court Should Be Above the Law
In a move that would make Founding Father James Madison do a spit-take of...
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Entertainment
Apple Releases Severance: Workplace Edition, Removes All Fun
CUPERTINO, CA — In a bold move to strengthen corporate compliance and keep workplace...
Politics News
Steve Bannon Advocates for Trump’s Third Term
WASHINGTON— In a move that has both constitutional scholars and reality itself shaking their...
Politics News
Kash Patel Unveils ‘Top Secret’ Documents? Wikipedia what?
WASHINGTON, D.C. – In a shocking exposé that has left the intelligence community somewhere...
Tech
What did European ancestors look like?
Bonkers scientists have unearthed evidence of what the human landscape looked like 10,000 years...